Come on, little follicles!

So I went in for my first monitoring ultrasound this morning (CD11). The ultrasound tech gave me the specs on the follicles, but I’m waiting to hear from the nurse for further instructions.

I have 3 follicles on my LEFT ovary – 2 at 10mm, and 1 at 11mm

I have 1 follicle on my RIGHT ovary – 10mm

They only report the follicles over 10mm apparently. They haven’t told me where they want me to be to trigger, but from what I read most doctors look for one or two follicles measuring at 18-20mm before triggering. They didn’t even tell me my lining thickness! And I forgot to ask. I hope I remember to ask the nurse when she calls back.

So the ultrasound tech reported the follicle sizes and said “that means you should come back in two days.” I haven’t scheduled because I want to hear that from my nurse. From what I understand, you can expect follicles to grow 1.5-2mm per day, so that would only bring me to 15mm on Friday at best, right? Like, do I need to go in on my heaviest work day? Maybe I can go back on Saturday? Also I’m trying to do the math in my head to figure out if I’ll need to pick up the sperm on Friday (which would be the case if I am going to do an IUI over the weekend at all), or at least order it on Friday (which would be the case if I am going to do an IUI on Monday). How fast have you guys seen follicle growth? Should I be bummed that my numbers seem low for CD11? I know there’s no “normal” and that I should expect my body to recruit later given that I typically ovulate later, I just wish I had a better barometer for all of this.

That’s my update for now! Waiting for the nurse to call to give me more detailed results and make a plan for the next ultrasound.

Catching Up

On this blog, and in my life in general lately, it feels like I’ve been playing a never ending game of catch up. So tonight I’ll leave you with some quick updates and hopefully in the next few days I’ll get back on top of things. Coming soon: I have a few topics I’ve been meaning to post about, and also a One Lovely Blog Award post.

So here goes for tonight:
– I am in the middle of my first ever Clomid cycle right now. I did a day 4/baseline ultrasound last Tuesday and took my first dose of 50mg of Clomid that evening, for a days 4-8 course. Last night was my final dose.

– Let’s talk about Clomid for a minute … I definitely experienced the “irritability” (aka bitchiness) side effect, which bummed me out/threw me for a loop. Otherwise, here is what I noticed about my body: My BBT has been low and VERY steady since I started. Like, fluctuating only .1 degree or so each day. I usually have the classic erratic temps associated with PCOS, so this seems significant to me. Also I’ve noticed CM changes much earlier – I’ve already had a day of EWCM, which threw me. I mostly keep worrying that I’m going to ovulate before we have a chance to trigger, probably because I just need something to worry about. And generally I’ve had about the same amount of CM as I usually see (later) in my cycle – which surprised me because I thought Clomid generally dries you up a bit. Finally, I’ve felt some twinges/mild cramps on both sides over the past 2 days or so. Is that normal? Have y’all noticed similar or different things?

– So in addition to Clomid, we are also doing ultrasound monitoring, an Ovidrel shot to trigger/time ovulation, and progesterone suppositories for this cycle. I keep saying we are pulling out the “big guns.” I really hope they do the trick for us! This is our last shot with this donor, so another significant investment and more time spent choosing is in our near future if this one doesn’t take. I’m really nervous about the shot, and no one has told me how to do it yet so that adds to things. The Crinone (progesterone vagina pills) and Ovidrel are getting shipped tomorrow, so I’m glad we at least don’t have to worry about getting them in time.

– My next ultrasound is first thing Tuesday morning (cycle day 11) to check how my follicles are doing. Any input on how they should be doing on day 11 after taking Clomid days 4-8? This all feels very new all of a sudden (and I was just getting the hang of the ovulation tests (that one’s for you Molly) and IUIs).

– I can’t stop myself from thinking about the “what ifs” – What if we get pregnant this time? We’d be just leaving the first trimester around Christmas – such good timing for telling people. What if we’re not? We have to find new sperm, this keeps getting more expensive, why isn’t my body doing the things it should be doing? What if I didn’t respond well to the Clomid? What if I ovulate before we can trigger? … My mind is spinning! I’m trying not to get worked up in it. We can only do what we can do, the rest is up to the universe and my body. I really need to get my brain in the place of not being distracted by TTC all the time. I have work to do / a job to keep /a marriage to nurture!

I’m really not a fan of this update-style post, but it’ll have to do for now. Here’s to TTC cycle #5, pulling out the big guns, and hopefully a BFP soon!

One of these days …

One of these days this is going to say “yes,” right?

Blood test to confirm is today. I’m in the waiting room to have my blood drawn right now.

At least I will have my new iPhone as a consolation prize :).

8 dpiui

So close and yet so far??

I’m half-way into this two week wait. Well, slightly more than half-way. I realized last weekend that the nurse midwife who did the IUI never mentioned what day I should go in for my blood test. Usually it would be 2 weeks after the IUI, but I’m not sure what labs are open on Saturdays. Also if she didn’t mention it she probably didn’t put the order in. I’ll have to send them an email to find out what the plan is.

I really really want this one to be “it.” I mean, of course all women who are ttc just want to be pregnant already … But this month feels different. I’m doing less of my usual self-talk to protect myself from disappointment. You know, that thing where you silently remind yourself every hour or so that you’re probably not pregnant and not to get your hopes up? I don’t know if I just keep forgetting to do it or if I emotionally don’t want to say/think it. It feels really nice to just hope that it worked this time.

That said, I don’t feel any different. My boobs hurt but they always do at this point in my cycle. I’ve felt a few twinges and momentary dull cramps in my uterus area over the past few days, but I’ve felt those before and am trying not to put any stock in them. I’m trying to just focus on getting through this week so I can get to part where I know.

On the docket for distractions this week: I’m re-reading Harry Potter (#nerdalert) for the 923rd time and I’m on Order of the Phoenix (#5), have a ton to do at work, and I’m hopefully picking up my new i.Phone 6 on Friday(!!)

Here’s hoping I don’t lose my sanity too much! I’ve only googled once, and I’m doing pretty well reminding myself that most symptoms don’t really happen until later, so it’s anyone’s game still 🙂 6 more days to go!

Dreams

My wife had a dream last night that I was pregnant with a girl. She’s a very down-to-earth, not dream-sharing kinda gal so I am probably putting too much emotional weight on this out-of-character prediction. 

… but please can it be true??

Fourth time’s the charm?

I never get it together to blog during the first half of my cycle. You know, the boring part. 

Anyway, yesterday I had my fourth IUI. I hemmed and hawed trying to decide whether to skip this cycle or not. To recap – the plan was to start Clomid, ultrasound monitoring, and a trigger shot this cycle. However, my vacation plans would have affected the schedule of ultrasounds, so that was out. I had trouble deciding whether to skip this cycle and conserve my remaining 2 vials of first-choice-donor for more monitored cycles. But also I am no good at waiting. As you already know, my impatience won out.

I got my positive OPK on Friday morning, paid the “same day transaction” fee to get a vial of sperm before they closed Friday (our bank isn’t open on weekends), and scheduled an IUI for Saturday at 11am. I feel pretty good about the timing this time. The last 2 cycles I’ve had my temp rise the day after my positive OPK, indicating that I’ve ovulated same day/had not-so-great timing with taking the OPKs in the first case. This month, I didn’t see my temp rise until today (IUI +1), so I am hopeful that the timing was closer to ideal. Our guy’s numbers were pretty good. Low-ish motility (40%) but high sperm count (66 million per mL).

I’m heading into this 2ww hopeful that I can keep my sanity and not obsess too much. If this one doesn’t end in a BFP – on to Clomid, ultrasound monitoring, and a trigger shot with our last vial of this donor.

On a personal note:

My wife and I had a spectacular time in Seattle for a 5-day vacation over Labor Day weekend. A real, live vacation. We weren’t there to visit family or friends (though I did get to catch up with a friend from high school who I haven’t seen in 10 years and her wife-to-be), go to a wedding, or attend a conference. It was really fantastic. We jammed a lot into 5 days (Mt. Rainier, salmon run, whale watch, great food, Space Needle, Chihuly, a Mariners game…), but it wasn’t overly planned. It was perfect.

Seattle from the Space Needle, Chihuly blown glass, amazing sushi, and playing Rumikub at Paradise Inn on Mt. Rainier. 

Also 4 is my lucky number. OK, I might actually be a little obsessed with the number 4. OK, I am officially clinically obsessed with the number 4 (I have OCD), so I’m hoping that means there’s some good juju out there in the Universe for a 4th try baby. I’ve got everything crossed.