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Well, that pesky little “who are you?” question is a tough one to answer here. This blog will (hopefully) be a covert operation of ours, so we’ll share a few generals and maybe make a few things up to throw others off the path.

My wife (Em) and I (Kate) got married in Fall 2013 after a 6+ year courtship. We have a home, a dog, and jobs we enjoy. Our lives are pretty awesome, but we are feeling a baby-shaped hole in our hearts. We’ve talked about having kids for what feels like forever (okay … maybe that was mostly me – but that darling wife of mine is happy to be along for the ride). A few different paths to family-making have been tossed around and explored, but right now we are ready to charge in the direction of biological conception.

I am the kind of person who can’t do anything without reading about it for months first, so I’ve been lurking around TTC blogs for quite some time. I’ve been hesitant to start my own blog because I feel that trying to get pregnant is a highly personal time – at least for me – and we both want to feel in control of all information dissemination. It’s a little funny to be back in the closet – neither of us has been here for a while! But this time it is entirely by choice. Given that we are trying to keep everything under wraps, I feel that this little blog will be so critical in allowing us to retain our mental health while we enter this new territory. I tend to deal with anything new or difficult in my life by talking about it, and keeping this a secret will be extremely difficult if not for the outlet of purging it all here. And hopefully I’ll find a little community of TTC bloggers to commiserate and celebrate with.

The Details:
Who is going to carry the babies? That would be me. My darling wife has no interest whatsoever in being pregnant or giving birth. I, on the other hand, am nothing short of obsessed with the idea.

Who’s the donor? Well, that we don’t know yet. We do know that we will be using donor sperm. We’ll look for a donor willing to release his identity to his possible offspring when they are of age. We’ll maybe look for someone who looks like my wife, but will mostly look for someone healthy and medically compatible with me. EDIT: Yep, we went with an anonymous but “open” donor from a sperm bank. He has some of my wife’s physical characteristics and that feels special to us. We had to switch donors after 5 failed IUIs with donor #1 because he sold out. Donor #2 also has some of my wife’s physical characteristics/interests and is medically compatible with me. We’re excited about his prospects 🙂

What else should I know before reading your blog? Let’s see … we are just a couple of lesbians trying to make a baby. I have PCOS, which will probably make it more difficult than it is for most – which is a large part of why we are staying in the baby closet. No need to have everyone we know publicly pitying us along the way. We are feeling excited and scared and impatient about all of this, which I’m sure are emotions shared by anyone in the same position.

I’m excited to get this blog going and start up a little community of support. It’s already killing me not being able to blab to everyone I know! Hit me up with comments or contact me through the Contact link and let’s be friends.

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6 responses »

  1. Hi, just found your blog! You guys went the same route as us with your donor selection. My wife is carrying our twins and when we chose our donor, we picked physical characteristics that are similar to mine. I really commend your ability to remain anonymous, we’ve never been good at that! Best of luck in everything!! ❤ Devan

    Reply
  2. Hey! I nominated you for the One Lovely Blog Award! If you’re interested, you can continue it on, but I wanted to let you know that your blog has impacted me! Thanks so much! http://confessionsslp.wordpress.com/2014/10/06/one-lovely-blog-award/

    Reply
  3. So glad I found your blog! My wife and I wanted to keep our attempts to concive under wraps too. Funny that we have to publish on the Web to keep it quiet. Well to keep it quiet and get some support at the same time – anonymity is a beautiful thing.

    Reply
  4. We just started a blog incognito as well. We wanted to keep our mental health through this process while keeping it close to our hearts.

    Reply

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